Tag Archives: pictures

Ruined Moment

I took my walk this morning, before the day got too hot, plus we have an electrician coming this afternoon. 

The day was beautiful. Sun was out, the sky was clear blue, and I was on the last stretch toward home when I saw a tiger swallowtail butterfly. It was drinking from a small puddle in the street. Its black and yellow wings slowly moving. I stood right next to it. The butterfly didn’t seem to mind.

Now, I tend to take photos on my walks, usually of flowers or funny things I see on the street (even blogged about a Sonic mint I saw on a walk, “A Sonic Mint and Holden Caulfield”). So what I did next was more of a reflex. I thought it would be cool to get a close up picture of the butterfly.

The butterfly was cool with me until I bent down with my phone to try to get the close up picture. Then it took off, even seemed to buzz my head as if to say, “You ruin the moment.” As you can see I did get a shot of the butterfly before it finally went to the flowers of a nearby house.

There is so much I could address about this moment. But that would reinforce the main idea of ruining a moment. 

Even in simple moments, there are a thousand ways we can ruin them, technology, over-thinking, being distracted by any number of things, wanting moments to get over so we can get to another moment… but we miss out on the depth of our lives, of emotions (whether it is positive or negative) and of understanding life and ourselves when we are not fully engaged in these unique moments.

I was enjoying watching a tiger swallowtail butterfly drink from a puddle on the street. I got distracted by wanting to take a picture and ruined it.

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Filed under Life

This house is not a home

I am not going to talk about all the dots life has been sharing with me about this idea. There have been many, some very deep and challenging. Instead I’m going to jump right to the point of this post, and that means we are jumping into deep waters right away.

A house is just one of the facets of building a home. It is a central spot where we build our homes. But it is just one of the elements to a strong home, a strong life.

Our routines are central to the quality of our homes. This doesn’t mean our lives are just a series of repeated actions, far from it. Routines that build a sense of safety and love allow us to do wonderful things. 

A major routine I have is to wake every child with Care Bear or unicorn energy. Even if they have the morning blues, I make sure they know a new day has begun, and I am happy to wake them. (My boys still talk about how much they hated my energy in the morning… but with smiles now.)

Another routine we have, as many of you readers know, is Sunday morning blueberry muffins.  We also try to have dinner together every night, even with practices, musical concerts, and games.

Even the simplest routines influence the sense of home during the day. For example, I fill everyone’s water bottle in the morning and make lunches when they don’t like the option at school. Every day.

I could go on, but these routines would happen anywhere, any house, under any circumstance, and they have. They happened when I was jobless. When we lived with the in-laws for six months. We were home.

Another aspect of home is the people we let in the front door. The people we let into our lives. Now, this is a tough element to delve into. If someone came into your home and started breaking your dishes, throwing them on the floor, and ransacking the cupboards…Would you just sit there and let them? Or if they started screaming at your children or taking a hammer to the walls? Would you just sit and smile while you watched them? I don’t think so.

Yet… yet, we allow people to emotionally do this to us. To walk into our lives and destroy us in the name of family or friendship. Our home becomes filled with fear, angst, doubt and negativity. We would defend our dishes, but not our hearts? Our home is influenced by the people we ask into our lives. 

I understand the complexity of relationships, especially when the family is used to justify accepting someone’s actions. But I will protect my home, protect my heart from being thrown on the floor to break.

The final aspect of a home is the decorations, the pictures, the figurines, and the books on the end tables. The stories and memories we create are hung on the walls of our lives. A beautiful home is created by living fully with the people we cherish. 

Yes, big moments, like family vacations. But also the small moments of breakfast at McDs or taking snack walks. The walls of our lives should be filled with stories. Our lives are our homes… and a home is where we should feel free to live.

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Filed under Family, Life