This morning everyone was home for breakfast, even Mocha, the newest addition to the family (she is my second son’s dog). As we do almost every Sunday we had blueberry muffins. We also had scramble eggs and bacon, Mocha loves bacon. Even mom fed her a piece.
As we talked about the holiday break, I was struck with the knowledge of what a special moment we were in. To have our family tradition of blueberry muffins on the last day of a year with everyone at the table. This day may never happen again.
Oh, we will have blueberry muffins next Sunday. We will all be together again, maybe with new additions as my older children build their adult lives. But this morning was unique, special on a number of different levels.
But isn’t everyday unique?
Even as we fall back into the routine of work and living, falling for the trap of thinking life is just a routine and each day is the same as the day before. It is not.
There will never be a day like tomorrow. Yes, it is a Monday. But it is the first Monday of 2024. That will never happen ever again. What will you do with the unique day you have tomorrow?
There are important routines in our lives. Things we should do on a regular basis. These routines build a foundation for us, but each day we are given is new, and 2023 has taught me that it is not guaranteed. We know this… but we don’t actually live like we know it.
So, I challenge you to see each day for what it is… a new day that you have never experienced before. To live life with an appreciation for the routines, yet excitement for the new opportunities that the day brings.
The hardest part of our gifts – of our talents – is that they are not made for us; they are made for other people.
Let me explain…
Yes, there is a payoff for our gifts for us. Our talents enrich our lives, brings us joy. In some cases we even become rich and famous from our talents. There is a payoff for us. But we can live our whole life without expressing our talents. We can be happy. We can even be rich and famous without spending a day working on or sharing our talents.
I am a writer, a poet, a blogger. But I could spend my time not writing and be fine…
Here’s the catch.
My gift, your gifts, are meant for other people.
We have a responsibility to give our talents to the world. This is where I am going to dive deep; the why of it all.
I’ll continue to use my writing as an example, but you can swap in your gift for the rest of the blog. Ready?
A void. There is a void in our lives and in the world if we don’t share our gifts. Yes, the world will go on. Our lives, as mentioned before, will go on, but there is a void. We and others will miss moments of joy and inspiration that can change the world. I know, you think I am using a hyperbole here. I am not.
You may have seen the movie, Coach Carter, where the above clip originates from. Or have read the quote, “Our Deepest Fear” from Marianne Williamson. Part of our light is our talents. Our gifts are meant for others.
One of my favorite moments as a poet was the night I attended an open mic in Omaha where I was able to meet a young poet who was inspired by my first book of poetry that I self published in college (And I Never Told You: 20 Year Anniversary Edition). His mom bought him a copy of the book at a local coffee shop when he was in high school. He is now a regular performing artist in Omaha and Lincoln. It was only because of social media that I got to meet him and know the story.
My story highlights a hardship of our gifts… knowing what happens after we give our talent to the world. Even if we become rich and famous, we don’t know how our talent helped someone.
Stephen King is one of my favorite authors. He knows his talent is appreciated by people because of the money he earns, by his popularity. But he has no idea how his books gave me an escape during some tough times. Stephen King doesn’t know the joy I’ve experienced sharing his stories with my kids. Taking them to see the new movie version of It. He doesn’t know… and that is OK because his gift was meant for me.
As a writer I know it is hard dealing with not knowing how my words affect the world. I am sure it is the same for you. I write something I think is awesome and nothing. No thumbs up, no like or love icon activated. No retweet. I have to be OK with that because my words are meant for other people. Writing brings me a sense of joy. It is awesome when a poem finds it way out of my head and onto the page. Then I must give that poem to the world for others to use. The same applies to you and your talents. If we learn how our gifts helped someone, inspired them, that’s cool, but usually we will never know. That’s not the reason for giving.
Do you see the void now? If you do nothing with your talents you miss out on a deeper joy in your life, but the world suffers more. When you share your talents you gift the world opportunities. Opportunities of inspiration. Opportunities of joy. Opportunities to change. Your talent is a gift… give it.
It is the holiday season, so there are a few movies we get to see a couple of times before the season is over. Elf is on heavy rotation. A certain line from the movie caught my attention the other day.
Did you really catch it?
Consider that notion for a minute.
Everyone can be on the nice list.
There were so many examples I considered to use to reinforce the idea. But I want this blog post to be clear, to be direct. As a dad, I’ve discovered that love is limitless. There is enough room for everyone in my life to feel loved.
We choose how we express love, or who we give it to. But there is no limit. I have six children, they are all loved. Now my energy gets spent sometimes, but my love for them has no bounds. This is true for everyone. Love is the greatest gift we can give, to everyone. Yes, it looks different for the people in our lives, but it is still love. Trust me, your heart can handle it.
There is enough love in this world… we just have to give it to others… and just maybe we will have better days, for everyone.
Have a wonderful holiday season! Thanks for reading this year. Be ready for an EPIC 2020!
What do you think is inside? Socks, a gift card, a new Bluetooth speaker, or maybe a half empty jar of mayonnaise? How would you react to each of those possibilities?
At the beginning of the month I attended a conference in Portland, Oregon. The final keynote was a local improv group, Brainwave Improv Company. The conference attendees were separated into five teams. At the end of the keynote each team would actually play an improv game and be awarded points. Think Whose Line is it Anyway.
While working in our groups the members of Brainwaves taught us a few different improv games (one of which would be the one we were judged on). Through those games the actors discussed aspects of improv that correlated to dealing with people at work and life. The same principles that made for a great improv session can be used to build strong relationships at work and home. One of my team’s games was “Gift Giving”.
The idea is simple. Two people exchange gifts. The person giving the gift could not say what it was, but through their actions give a hint to what it might be. A person might seem to be lifting a huge box to give to the other person, or act like the box was moving. The person receiving the gift had to take the gift, “open” it, and share what the gift actually was. Of course the whole game is to be funny, but the lesson the actors shared was powerful.
Brainwaves first shared the idea that in improv everything is a gift; a line, a situation, a moment of silence, anything can be used by the actors to make the game / scene funny. As actors they had to be open to whatever the “gift” might be and adapt, even if they had an idea ready to use. To make a scene flow they had to embrace the gift of the situation. They then moved the idea to work and life by teaching us how to play the game, “Gift Giving”. See, the real responsibility for the game is on the person receiving the gift. The whole game centers on how that person reacts to the gift, even when it is something crazy or unwanted.
If the person receiving the gift responds in a negative way the whole scene falls apart… You see where this is going don’t you? We have all been on both sides of this situation. We have received a gift that we didn’t like. We have given a gift only to seen the rejection in their face when they opened it. The scene falls apart.
To play the game we had to love what was in the gift. We had to carry the game with our reaction. But the actors took the idea a step deeper. Remember that in improv anything is a gift to the other actors. Brainwaves pushed that idea to dealing with everyday life. How did we act when presented with situations at work? How did we responded when we have to work with someone we don’t like? How do we respond to a child spilling milk? Yes, it is the attitude cliche. We have all heard, in some way, that your attitude is the key to handling life. But what got me about how Brainwaves addressed the issue was the metaphor of a gift.
In my house a gift is a way someone shows that they care about you. (Yes, it is one of my dadisms for my kids.) Now, I’m not naive. I know that tragic things happen to us. We get our hearts broken. Life can blindside us and drop us to our knees. Yet, how many success stories come from those tragedies? How many people took the situation as a gift and ran with it? Not to mention just using the idea to handle our everyday mishaps. What gift have you been given today? Did the scene fall apart? Or did you run with it?
It is all Connected 