The wind almost pushed me back as I took a step around the corner on my walk this evening. Wind gusts were close to 30 miles an hour. Other parts of my walk were nice. The clouds were a mix of puffy white dollops and angry gray streaks. I was enjoying my walk.
And just like that I was crying.
Earlier today I wrote an autobiographical poem for day 16 of the April Poem a Day challenge. It dealt with the time my biological mom moved us to Albuquerque. So, my personal history was on my mind. Then my playlist played “Walk Like a Man” by Tim McGraw (number 85 on my top 100 list).
There’s a lot to this song I connect with, but it wasn’t really about those issues.
Grief is an interesting emotion. The world suddenly shifted in color, as if a filter had been applied behind my eyes. And just like that I knew my biological father was gone. And with that realization came a wave of loss. Sadly not of him, but of what could have been. It has been four months since his passing, but everyday from here on out is a reminder that in part, our story is over.
But I’m still here dealing with the hurt.
And just like that the world is different… I’m not sure it is better, though.
It is all Connected 
“The line ‘I’m still here dealing with the hurt’ really hit me. It takes strength to face that pain. You’ve got this.”
Thank you. I appreciate the words of encouragement. Part of living is dealing with big moments and the feelings that are associated with them. Thank you again for reading and leaving a comment!